“Most organisations spend their time marketing to the crowd. Smart organisations assemble the tribe” (p. 30) Seth speaks of how we need to belong to something or some sort of cause that inspires us. As humans we are social animals and actually need to connect with other human beings. So much so that we are waiting for someone to lead us. To show us the way. We are looking for innovation and initiative.

Now to achieve all of this we need leaders. People who want to inspire, influence and encourage. I have always maintained that we all have within us the potential to influence, inspire and encourage. It’s just that some of us do not want to take the time and make the effort to do this.

But what if you do? Then this is your key for growing a successful organisation either online or offline. Now this made me think about my career to date and I realized something profound (at least for me), that I had already been doing this very successfully offline and that really it was a small jump to do this online. Same principles really:

- have a cause that you believe in and want to share with others. For me I have spent a lifetime working with people in the worst possible situations. I often thought that it would be great to get the message out to 1000’s of people that there are a few principles in life that if you follow, life will be more successful and not so tough.

- have a vehicle to spread the word. Today we have the perfect vehicle with our communications revolution.

- believe in yourself. Have the convictions that you can lead, inspire and influence.

- live the life you are preaching – be congruent between your speech and your actions because if you are not people will see it.

- genuinely care about your tribe. In fact, leaders truly care more about their tribe than they do about their own gain and people will respond to that genuineness.

I hope these thoughts inspire you as they have inspired me.

Until the next time
Julie
PS. I really would love to hear your thoughts about this idea of tribes. Send me a line or two!
PPS. If you would like to know a little bit more about what I do have a look at a couple of my websites:
www.secretstoemotionalhealth.com
www.thrivingalifecrisis.com

I thought alot about this conversation that afternoon and decided that I actually liked this description of myself. But at this point you may be wondering what it has to do with online business success?

I have heard of some people who have made it big online quickly. They were in the right spot at the right time with the right product. I have met many more who are more like me – hard working, making lots of mistakes and passionate about what they do.

Some of these people have given up. Unlike the bulldog, they decided that it was just too hard. You know what, sometimes, that is exactly as I have felt but there is a difference between feeling a certain way and giving in to those feelings.

So what exactly, is tenacity and why is this quality so important to the success of an online business? One online dictionary describes it as – “persistent determination – the quality of being determined to do or achieve something”. Other words used by the Thesaurus are: doggedness, perseverance, determination, purpose and persistence.

Yes, you need:  technical knowledge (if not your own then at least someone else’s), a good product, customers, marketing but if you do not have tenacity you simply won’t kick the ball through the goal posts. You will become fatigued long before that and simply give in.

Someone challenged me last week to get off the comfy couch and get doing – learning, working, connecting, experimenting.

I’d like to pass this same challenge on to you. If you are serious about an online business, then you will have to keep at it. You will have to learn and grow from your mistakes and failures. You will have to be the bulldog hanging on for your strength and one day you will start to see the trickles and then the floodgates coming rushing in.

If this post encouraged you then send the link to others who you think may benefit: www.diaryofanonlinebusiness.com

Until next time

Julie

I’m busy writing my third ebook “Thriving Not Just Surviving a Divorce: How to Bounce Back and Find Happiness Again”

In my work I see many people who go through this very difficult time. They often feel like the pain will never go away and that they will never be able to enjoy life again.

I wanted to write a book to give hope. This is something I went through myself and I know what it is like to be in that dark tunnel. I’ll be sharing my own story in the book but I’m looking for others who would like to have their story included in my book.

What I’m looking for is:

• people who have been or are going through a divorce
• people who not only survived the divorce but in the end actually thrived it
• people who can share with others what they did that helped them get through this time so successfully
• people who can inspire others and help them successfully along this difficult journey

It does not need to be long – probably 200 – 500 words at the most

I would need to use your name (at least your Christian name) and some combination of your occupation, city and country

Please only send your success stories as the book is about inspiring people to grow and rebuild an even better life.

I will have total say over whose stories go into the book and how the story is edited. For your trouble I would love to send you an electronic copy of the finished ebook so don’t forget to send your email address

thanks for your help and please send this off to whoever you think would be able to help

Until next time

Julie

Well, it is that time of year again when with all good intentions we make our New Year’s Resolution – you know – all those important goals that we are determined we will achieve for 2010. Maybe some of these ring a bell:

• Lose weight
• Get fit
• Improve my marriage
• Earn more money
• Spend more time with the kids
• Further my education
• Start that business I have been dreaming about
• Travel around the world
• Find peace and happiness

Unfortunately, most people never complete their New Year’s resolution. We start out strong in January, continue intermittently during the year but by December we realize that we have fallen short of the goal and once again feel discouraged and lose hope.
Now, if I am writing to you then you have either visited my website www.secretstoemotionalhealth.com/signup.html or you have received a number of my free products via email. I was trying to think about what else I could give that would help people live healthier, happier and wealthier lives and I figured the best thing possible would be to help you achieve your dreams for 2010.

Follow these steps to the letter and you will achieve your New Year’s Resolution dream:

1. Write your dream/dreams down. It has been proven again and again that those who actually write down their dreams have a much higher success rate of achieving them. In fact, that was just how I met and married my second husband and soul mate. I wrote down the 18 things I was looking for in a partner and measured everyone against this list. You probably want to know if he got 18 ticks? Well, actually he achieved 17 out of the 18 so I figured he was a keeper. (see my website: www.guidetoonlinedatingtips.com if you want to know more about how to find the love of your life online)

2. Be very specific about what you write eg dates, full descriptions and even photos of what it is you are aiming for. If possible have a symbol around you all the time that reminds you of where you soon will be. One of our goals is to create great wealth. We have a photo of a bucket overflowing with water as this symbolizes to us that what is in the bucket is ours and what flows out is for the betterment of others.

3. Join a group or have people around you that can fulfill a number of very important roles. People to mentor you, to educate you and support you. We all struggle at times when on a journey to success and it is imperative to have someone to turn to who will both encourage you plus keep you accountable. This is a non negotiable if you really want to achieve your dream

4. Anticipate discouragement. I would find it hard to believe there would be one person on the face of this earth who has not felt discouraged at times when working towards their dream – I know that I have. Accept this is normal and be prepared with that great support network around you. It will pass if you keep focused on what is really important to you. If you would like to know more about how to tackle discouragement have a look at the article I wrote earlier on this blog

5. Cultivate an “I Know” attitude. “I know that I will achieve my dream” Talk to yourself like this all the time and be very specific eg “ I know that I will weight __kgs by __date” Believe in yourself and and increase your self confidence. Remember that you are the most important factor in your life success.

Now I know that many people want to improve their health, wealth and happiness and have been thinking about joining my mentoring program Secrets to Emotional Health but life happens and you just didn’t get around to it

FREE BONUS:
By now you should know how committed I am to seeing people’s lives turned around for the better, so just for this month (January), I want to make it easier for you and offer the first month in my membership site for FREE! Yes that’s right – FREE! That’s a saving of $49 and after that you will be billed at the normal rate of $49 per month. If you want to take advantage of this cash back offer just email me at contact@secretstoemotionalhealth.com and tell me of your interest.

Until next time
Julie Spain Author, Executive Life Coach, Public Speaker

PS. Would you like to know what my New Year’s Resolution is?
To give at least two talks per month on the inside secrets to improving your business, your health, your wealth and your relationships
So if you belong to an organization whose members could benefit from my 25 years of experience helping people to live their very best life, then contact me at contact@secretstoemotionalhealth.com

I’d like to give you the first instalment in “The 6 Vital Steps to Emotional Health” Hope you enjoy.

How To Be Free Of Emotional Baggage and Finally Live a Life of Health, Vitality and Abundance

Did you know that research shows that 90% of all illnesses are stress related?

Did you know that stress is caused by negative emotions such as fear, worry, frustration, powerlessness, resentment, bitterness, sadness and many other feelings?

If you control your emotional health, you control your overall health and well being!

Here are Six vital steps that if you take action with, will help you get started on a more energetic, healthy, happy, content and fulfilled life.

Let’s get healthy:

Step One – Establishing Self Care as an Integral Part of Emotional, Mental and Physical Health

“What you are is God’s gift to you. What

you do with yourself is your gift to God.”

Danish Proverb

Human beings are a complete system made up of the physical, emotional, mental, spiritual and social. Each part of our system impacts on the other. To have good emotional health we must have good physical health. To have good physical health, we must have good emotional health. So let’s start at the being with how to care for our body and reap the rewards of strong emotional health.

On any given day, we have a certain amount of energy to spend to accomplish the necessary tasks for the day. If life is going well and we are fit, healthy and happy, then we will have a larger amount of energy to spend than if we are going through some form of life crisis. When faced with life’s problems, our precious resource of energy can be very quickly used up.

Digestion uses more energy than any other activity we engage in. However, negative painful emotions are the second greatest user of our finite stores of energy. In other words, personal disaster will cause us to feel many painful emotions such as, fear, hurt, frustration, confusion and powerlessness and these emotions will use up a very large proportion of our daily energy allowance.

Without an adequate source of energy, we will find it very difficult to successfully navigate the challenges we may face as we move forward to a healthier life. Not only will our body feel exhausted but our brain function will also be diminished and we may find it difficult to make decisions and remember things.

Just like a car requires not only petrol to run, but the right sort of petrol – our bodies also require the correct fuel and proper care to perform at a time when we are most challenged.

Below, is a simple but effective prescription for self care that if followed, will help you perform at your optimum:

· Be careful about the types of food you eat. When under pressure, we often turn to the fast foods that are easy to reach for and give us a quick burst of sugar. In very simple terms:

o The best food to eat is unprocessed. Try to stay away from processed foods such as, fast food, cakes, chocolates, sugar drink.

o Replace these with vegetables, fruits, nuts and protein such as meat and fish. Complex carbohydrates such as fruits, vegetables and whole grains help increase our levels of serotonin. Serotonin is a brain chemical or neurotransmitter that helps us feel calm. Of course, this is very important in times of crisis.

o Protein taken three times a day, at about the size of the palm of your hand, will help you to not feel as tired.

o Try to eat something no more than one to two hours after waking as this will help keep your blood sugar levels up for the day

o Eat frequently, that is every three to four hours, the types of foods I have mentioned, as this also will help keep your blood sugar levels up, thereby helping you to not feel tired and confused.

· What you drink is also important. Remember to drink a minimum of two litres of water per day. Reduce or cut out alcohol as it acts as both a stimulate and depressant. During times of stress our adrenals are working overtime and it is a good idea to avoid anything that will further stimulate them. Caffeine and sugar also stimulate the adrenals so it is important to reduce or cut out drinks such as cola, coffee and soft drinks.

· Try to get some form of cardiovascular exercise 4 – 5 times a week for between 30 – 45 minutes each session. This form of exercise includes walking, swimming, cycling, running and dancing. Cardiovascular exercise helps us produce many good chemicals such as, serotonin, already mentioned and endorphins which are a natural opiate or feel good chemical. This form of exercise also helps us get rid of the stress chemicals such as, cortisol and adrenaline that are produced in times of adversity and stress.

· Try to get adequate rest, sleep and relaxation. During periods of stress, the body produces high levels of toxins. It is when we relax and sleep that the body has an opportunity to repair and restore itself. Denying yourself rest will affect your ability to continue to reach your full potential.

· Tap into every form of support possible.

Although this information may be a bit technical I have found that if people understand why they need to keep up these basic self care practices they are more motivated. Keeping your body in good shape, will be one of the most powerful things you do to help keep your mind and emotions in peek condition to help you bring about the changes needed to live your best life.

I’ll send part two very soon but to learn more why not come to one of my seminars:

Talk soon

Julie

PS the website again is www.secretstoemotionalhealth.com and I’ll be sending out lots of free products to change your life

How to Improve Memory

Use It or Lose It:  Dancing Makes You Smarter

Musings by Richard Powers

For hundreds of years dance manuals and other writings have lauded the health benefits of dancing, usually as physical exercise.  More recently we’ve seen research on further health benefits of dancing, such as stress reduction and increased serotonin level, with its sense of well-being.

Then most recently we’ve heard of another benefit:  Frequent dancing apparently makes us smarter.  A major study added to the growing evidence that stimulating one’s mind can ward off Alzheimer’s disease and other dementia, much as physical exercise can keep the body fit.

You’ve probably heard about the New England Journal of Medicine <http://content.nejm.org/cgi/content/abstract/348/25/2508>  report on

the effects of recreational activities on mental acuity in aging.   Here

it is in a nutshell.

The 21-year study of senior citizens, 75 and older, was led by the Albert Einstein College of Medicine in New York City, funded by the National Institute on Aging, and published in the New England Journal of Medicine.  Their method for objectively measuring mental acuity in aging was to monitor rates of dementia, including Alzheimer’s disease.

The study wanted to see if any physical or cognitive recreational activities influenced mental acuity.  They discovered that some activities had a significant beneficial effect.  Other activities had none.

They studied cognitive activities such as reading books, writing for pleasure, doing crossword puzzles, playing cards and playing musical instruments.  And they studied physical activities like playing tennis or golf, swimming, bicycling, dancing, walking for exercise and doing housework.

One of the surprises of the study was that almost none of the physical activities appeared to offer any protection against dementia.  There can be cardiovascular benefits of course, but the focus of this study was the mind.  There was one important exception:  the only physical activity to offer protection against dementia was frequent dancing.

            Reading – 35% reduced risk of dementia

            Bicycling and swimming – 0%

People who played the hardest gained the most:  For example, seniors who did crossword puzzles four days a week had a 47% lower risk of dementia than those who did the puzzles once a week.

            Playing golf – 0%

            Dancing frequently – 76%.

That was the greatest risk reduction of any activity studied, cognitive or physical.

Quoting Dr. Joseph Coyle, a Harvard Medical School psychiatrist who wrote an accompanying commentary:

“The cerebral cortex and hippocampus, which are critical to these activities, are remarkably plastic, and they rewire themselves based upon their use.”

And from from the study itself, Dr. Katzman proposed these persons are more resistant to the effects of dementia as a result of having greater cognitive reserve and increased complexity of neuronal synapses.  Like education, participation in some leisure activities lowers the risk of dementia by improving cognitive reserve.

Our brain constantly rewires its neural pathways, as needed.  If it doesn’t need to, then it won’t.

            Aging and memory

When brain cells die and synapses weaken with aging, our nouns go first, like names of people, because there’s only one neural pathway connecting to that stored information.  If the single neural connection to that name fades, we lose access to it.  So as we age, we learn to parallel process, to come up with synonyms to go around these roadblocks.  (Or maybe we don’t learn to do this, and just become a dimmer bulb.)

The key here is Dr. Katzman’s emphasis on the complexity of our neuronal synapses.  More is better.  Do whatever you can to create new neural paths.  The opposite of this is taking the same old well-worn path over and over again, with habitual patterns of thinking and living our lives.

When I was studying the creative process as a grad student at Stanford, I came across the perfect analogy to this:

            The more stepping stones there are across the creek,

            the easier it is to cross in your own style.

The focus of that aphorism was creative thinking, to find as many alternative paths as possible to a creative solution.  But as we age, parallel processing becomes more critical.  Now it’s no longer a matter of style, it’s a matter of survival — getting across the creek at all.

Randomly dying brain cells are like stepping stones being removed one by one.  Those who had only one well-worn path of stones are completely blocked when some are removed.  But those who spent their lives trying different mental routes each time, creating a myriad of possible paths, still have several paths left.

The Albert Einstein College of Medicine study shows that we need to keep as many of those paths active as we can, while also generating new paths, to maintain the complexity of our neuronal synapses.

            Why dancing?

We immediately ask two questions:

*  Why is dancing better than other activities for improving mental capabilities?

*  Does this mean all kinds of dancing, or is one kind of dancing better than another?

That’s where this particular study falls short.  It doesn’t answer these questions as a stand-alone study.  Fortunately, it isn’t a stand-alone study.  It’s one of many studies, over decades, which have shown that we increase our mental capacity by exercising our cognitive processes.

Intelligence: Use it or lose it.  And it’s the other studies which fill in the gaps in this one.  Looking at all of these studies together lets us understand the bigger picture.

Some of this is discussed here

<http://socialdance.stanford.edu/syllabi/intelligent.htm>  (the page you probably just came from) which looks at intelligence in greater depth.

The essence of intelligence is making decisions.  And the concluding advice, when it comes to improving your mental acuity, is to involve yourself in activities which require split-second rapid-fire decision making, as opposed to rote memory (retracing the same well-worn paths), or just working on your physical style.

One way to do that is to learn something new.  Not just dancing, but anything new.  Don’t worry about the probability that you’ll never use it in the future.  Take a class to challenge your mind.  It will stimulate the connectivity of your brain by generating the need for new pathways.  Difficult and even frustrating classes are better for you, as they will create a greater need for new neural pathways.

Then take a dance class, which can be even better.  Dancing integrates several brain functions at once, increasing connectivity.  Dancing simultaneously involves kinesthetic, rational, musical and emotional processes.

            What kind of dancing?

Let’s go back to the study:

            Bicycling, swimming or playing golf – 0% reduced risk of dementia

But doesn’t golf require rapid-fire decision-making?  No, not if you’re a long-time player.  You made most of the decisions when you first started playing, years ago.  Now the game is mostly refining your technique.  It can be good physical exercise, but the study showed it led to no improvement in mental acuity.

Therefore take the kinds of dance classes where you must make as many split-second decisions as possible.  That’s key to maintaining true intelligence.

Does any kind of dancing lead to increased mental acuity?  No, not all forms of dancing will produce this benefit.  Not dancing which, like golf or swimming, mostly works on style or retracing the same memorized paths.  The key is the decision-making.  Remember, Jean Piaget suggested that intelligence is what we use when we don’t already know what to do.

We wish that 25 years ago the Albert Einstein College of Medicine thought of doing side-by-side comparisons of different kinds of dancing, to find out which was better.  But we can figure it out by looking at who they studied: senior citizens 75 and older, beginning in 1980.

Those who danced in that particular population were former Roaring Twenties dancers (back in 1980) and then former Swing Era dancers (today), so the kind of dancing most of them continued to do in retirement was what they began when they were young: freestyle social dancing — basic foxtrot, swing, waltz and maybe some Latin.

I’ve been watching senior citizens dance all of my life, from my parents (who met at a Tommy Dorsey dance), to retirement communities, to the Roseland Ballroom in New York.  I almost never see memorized sequences or patterns on the dance floor.  I mostly see easygoing, fairly simple

social dancing — freestyle lead and follow.   But freestyle social

dancing isn’t that simple!  It requires a lot of split-second decision-making, in both the lead and follow roles.

      I need to digress here:

I want to point out that I’m not demonizing memorized sequence dancing or style-focused pattern-based ballroom dancing.  I sometimes enjoy sequence dances for several good reasons <http://socialdance.stanford.edu/syllabi/sequences.htm> .  Plus there are stress-reduction benefits of any kind of dancing, cardiovascular benefits of physical exercise, and even further benefits of feeling connected to a community of dancers.  So all dancing is good.

But when it comes to preserving mental acuity, then some forms are better than others.  When we talk of intelligence (use it or lose it) then the more decision-making we can bring into our dancing, the better.

Challenge yourself to try new things.  Make more decisions more often.

Intelligence: use it or lose it.

Hope this article encourages you to get out there, have some fun and make yourself smarter

Until next time

Julie 

I didn’t think so! What human being has not suffered from some form of self doubt in their lives? Will she accept my offer of a date?  I don’t think that I’m going to be offered the job. Why is it that everyone else in the world is smarter, prettier and more successful? Or, here’s the big doozie: “Why does everything have to be so hard for me and so easy for everyone else?”

Come on now, be honest, surely I am not the only one who goes through this painful experience of self doubt?  The question here could be why write about this on a blog designed for online business success? For one reason only: self doubt could rob you of any opportunity to be successful with your online business – hey, even with me and my online business.

Most success coaches (that’s me believe it or not) would tell you that success is determined 90% by what we think and only 10% by what we do. There was an interesting experiment some time ago that looked at coaching success for basketballers. They took three groups: the first group was only allowed to think about shooting hoops, the second group was only allowed to practice shooting hoops and the third group was coached in both mental and practical basketball skills. Which group did the best? Group one and three both succeeded to the same level. In other words, the actual action of shooting hoops made litttle difference. It was all about training the mind.

Occassionally this self defeating blockage of self doubt pops into my head so what do I do about it? This is what I do and maybe it will help you:

1. Remember the dream. We have a dream book and I like to remind myself of exactly why I started this online business in the first place. It is a powerful motivator.
2. Allow myself a little pity party but after a short time of feeling the feelings and feeling sorry for myself, I take a deep breath and tell myself to get back on with the job.
3. I recall all the things in my life that I have already been successful with eg. raising three daughters and for part of that time on my own, completing two degrees, having  a  private practice for 15 years, managing a 140 staff successfully in the program that I run currently, surviving a terrible divorce and best of all finding the love of my life later in life. If I can do these things then I can continue to face life’s challenges and win
4. Mix with people who will pull you up, not pull you down. We all need encouragement. I truly hope that my blog is an encouragement to you and that in some ways I can be a mentor to others in need.

Let me know what you do to deal with an attack of the self doubts. I know that it will be of help to others who are reading this.

I’m off for a weeks holiday to beautiful Coffs Harbour tomorrow so no post for a week. I really am a firm believer in the need for self care and nurturing.

Until next time

Julie

Let me know if you have any other points that would help other people in this area of running the race to win the prize. In particular, I would love to hear what roadblocks you have to achieving your dreams?

Until next time
Julie